Looking back: Day 2

 [pictures are courtesy of Lightbrush Photography]

Our wedding ceremony was set to begin at 3.30 p.m. Deliberately so, because I and Bangun are two late-risers. Try to wake us up early in the morning, especially after a long night up, and you'll meet two crankyheads who's always trying to outcrank each other.

Expectedly, I woke up at....10.30 a.m. on the day I got married. After a very unhealthy McD breakfast, we drove to PTIK and started getting ready at 1 p.m. There was a glitch with Cut Marlyn team at this point. Kak Dede arrived late and only brought two people to do the makeup, hairdo, and dress a dozen of people.

Riuh rendah lah suasananya.

Anxiously waiting for the nail polish to dry

But of course, the bride stayed and sat pretty in her dressing room, waiting for the ceremony to begin. A few dozen screams from my dramatic mom later, it did begin. We used the tradition where the bride cannot enter the room before the groom is finished with his Ijab Qabul, a vow said to the bride's father that he will marry his daughter.

I waited in the next room, where the sound system was loud and clear. It was all a big blur until Bangun said, “Saya terima nikahnya Putri Bapak, Putri Dian Prameshwari Benprang, dengan mas kawin tersebut tunai.”

The handshake that says it all

In an instant, I cried like a baby.

I hadn't expected to cry, or to cry that hard, but you know, it's not everyday that you get to hear your boyfriend say that. It hit me that he (hopefully) would be there for the rest of our lives, as the leader of our little family.

Anyway, cheesiness aside, yay we're married! Now on to the par-tay, Sumatran style!

Kak Dede and Mbak Tanti both take turns to do my hair and makeup. I had prepared myself to wear the gazillion headpiece, but that day, I was nervous as hell and kept remembering horror stories of brides who collapsed when wearing sunting for too long. At around 6.30 I was set to go, and my nightmare came true; my head hurt like hell and it felt as if there's a spear stuck on my skull.

I asked for a Panadol (thanks, Run!) but it didn't do any good. My palms were sweating from holding back the pain, but I kept praying and thinking, “maybe this is the way it's supposed to feel.”

Thankfully, just about five minutes before we had to walk in, Tante Marlyn saw the worry lines in my face and rearranged the headpiece. All set and ready to smile to thousands of faces!

That's my sister, the dancer in the pink!

A moment before the reception began

Saman dance halfway to the party

The rest of the night went by too quickly. We stood on the stage for two and a half hours, but it seriously felt like ten minutes. It was heart-warming to greet the guests and knowing that they came all the way—from wherever they were—for us. The headpiece on my head weighed a ton, but it didn't hurt. And I didn't mind at all. I'd been worried that I'd hurt my cheeks from smiling, but nothing. I was more than happy to smile.

I used to think that Indonesian wedding receptions are overrated and overdone, but trust me, you want that. The festivity of celebrating your marriage with the ones you loved, plus knowing that people are there to celebrate with you, is worth all the penny and the tears, plus the occasional hair-pulling mood in between.

To say I'm happy is an understatement. Overall, I'm giving 1,563250 out of 5 for the wedding. I hope I can remember what the day feels like for the rest of my life.

Looking back: Day 1 (updated with new photos)

[pictures are courtesy of Ronna Nirmala, an aspiring journo AND photographer]

"How did you feel, getting married?"

"What is it like, married life?"

Those are the two questions I've been hearing post-Nov. 19. I've been answering with a single word, a nod, and a smile. So now let's have a look at question number 1: How did I feel that day?

Well, all vendors aside, Nov. 17-19 felt surreal to me. It began on Thursday, where everyone started to prepare my house for the Siraman and Midodareni the next day.

The giddiness and anxiety grew even bigger on Friday, when everyone gathered for my Javanese rituals. I prepared myself some text to read for the Sungkeman, but still, the lump in my throat was so big, I couldn't say the words clearly.

It was a modest celebration, really. After I was bathed, I stayed in my room getting my hair and makeup done for Midodareni. I heard laughters from outside, when my parents did the Dodol Dawet ritual where they sold Es Cincau to the guests with fake money. In Javanese tradition, it's believed to attract and symbolize that people will come flocking to the wedding party.

As dusk settled, Bangun's family arrived in my house for Midodareni. Correct me if I'm wrong, but in Javanese, this ritual symbolizes the night where angels come down from heaven to guard the bride. The groom and his family, except his parents, visit the bride's house to check if she's still in good health.

However, the bride cannot go out of her room and only female relatives of the groom can check on her. They also delivered the Seserahan boxes. The groom is not allowed to see his bride, nor is he allowed to eat and drink anything but mineral water. The latter is believed to prevent him from getting poisoned by any unhappy family member.

At this point, I felt like a school girl before a big date, except that I couldn't see my date. I kept asking anyone how Bangun looked like and wanted so much to get out.

But of course I had to wait for another day to see him. After everyone was gone that night, it became even more surreal that in the next 24 hours I would be married and having the reception. Just when I'd thought I was under the spotlight for a whole day, it hit me that Saturday would be an even bigger day.

Looking back: Lightbrush Photography (updated)

I'd recommend Lightbrush on the first sentence.

Why? In a nutshell, because they take amazing photos. Well I know it depends on one's taste, but to me, this vendor can find the coolest angles with beautiful shots. Plus it comes with a very affordable price.

On the day, they arrived early at PTIK's guest house where we did most of the preparation. Mas Pepy, one of the owners, himself was on duty, along with several others. My first impression was that they were fun to hangout with, and did not make you feel awkwardly under the spotlight.

While Mbak Tanti did my face and hair, Mas Pepy and his team never took a break from taking pictures. This went on until the end of the night, seriously. There's gotta be thousands of pictures in those cameras.

However, there's this glitch that, to me, is pretty major. They forgot to come to the technical meeting.

I know right.

Mbak Indri, Mas Pepy's wife who does the marketing and behind-the-scene stuff, apologized over and over again. It was an honest mistake, so I let it go. And then, just before the reception, there was an incident of miscommunication; neither Lightbrush or PTIK had prepared a cable to connect the jimmy jib, which we rented from Lightbrush, to the screen, which was from PTIK.

Had they come to the technical meeting and discuss, this wouldn't have happened.

But still, I got to give the credit to Mas Pepy, who handled the incident calmly and quickly made a decision. Magically, a connector appeared and all was good again, even though there was a blackout on the screen because we had to wait for the cable.

Update: The CD arrived yesterday and there were 2,061 photos inside. Two thousand and sixty one. I put it on slideshow and didn't finish looking at the pictures after two hours. Lightbrush took every single moment of the wedding, taking me back to Nov. 19. Thanks to the photos, now I know what the wedding looked like. Plus, they put another CD with a highlight of the photos. Later on, Mbak Indri told me it was a bonus because they had missed the meeting.

Overall, I'm giving 5 out of 5 stars for Lightbrush's photo quality, but 4 out of 5 stars for their service because of the technical meeting and cable incidents. Video will be out in about two months, so I can't rate it until then.

In the meantime, here's some of their work. Mbak Indri is available at 081802046374.

Looking back: Laili (and Friends)

Aside from foods, another thing you won't notice in your own wedding is the music. I had been warned by dozens of people about this, but I didn't care. I wanted the songs in my wedding to match what I like, not some random cheesy love songs or pretentious jazz tunes.

And with Laili and Friends, I got exactly what I wanted.

I'm not even sure the name of the band is Laili and Friends, but that's what Laili the vocalist told me to put on the MC script. Laili is a high-school friend of mine, and has the voice of dewi dari surga. Bagus amat.

Before we get to the reception, let's see the songlist I chose:

1.Tonight, Tonight – Smashing Pumpkins
2.I Love You More Today Than Yesterday
3.A Whole New World - Aladdin
4.Nobody Does It Better – Carly Simon
5.Mushaboom – Feist
6.Here Comes Your Man – Meaghan Smith/Pixies
7.Digital Love – Daft Punk
8.Everything's Not Lost – Coldplay
9.Lost In Your Eyes – Debbie Gibson
10.If You Leave – OMD

11.Waters of March
12.Especially For You
13.I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing
14.LOVE
15.Save The Last Dance
16.Somewhere Beyond The Sea
17.Waiting In Vain
18.We Could Be In Love
19.When You Tell Me That You Love Me
20.My Cherie Amor

The first ten were our own choice, and the last half were the songs we had to pick from Laili's play list. I had a doubt that Laili (or any band) would want to play the songs we picked, but she didn't say anything, so I assumed everything was good. And if anything did not go well, I just kept praying they'd play Tonight, Tonight 'cos it had been my dream wedding song since years ago.

Fast forward to the reception. I was on the dressing room, getting my makeup retouched when I heard Laili and the band rehearsing Tonight, Tonight from the auditorium. I and Bangun grinned at each other and knew then this band would not disappoint.

Throughout the night, to be honest, those people were right. I didn't pay much attention to the songs the band played. I tried to listen and managed to catch a few songs, but then the guests kept walking up and congratulating us on the stage, and the songs vanished from my ears again.

I did, however, caught the song Everything's Not Lost sung by the band with Ingga, a dear friend of ours and also a kick-ass singer, on the vocals. Ah-may-zing. Up to this day, some people still come up to me and say the band was awesome and ditto for the songs. Laili and Friends were not too loud for a wedding reception, yet you can hear the songs playing as the background to the festivity.

This is also a plus point;  Laili is one pretty woman and she dressed very elegantly for the reception, with her long black dress. Oh yeah, and she sings hell good. I'm giving them 5 out of 5 stars. Laili is available at laili.fauziah99@gmail.com.

Looking back: Dwi Tunggal Citra

They say food is the single most important thing of a wedding reception. They say if you run out of foods, or if it doesn't taste good, then the party's a failure. I half-heartedly agree with this, although of course to me, the bride, the number one priority is how I look.

Anyway, back to the foods. We didn't want to gamble with this, so we went a bit crazy on what to serve the guests with foods from Dwi Tunggal Citra, who apparently does not believe in online marketing since their web site and Facebook page are outdated.

I was a bit frustrated with choosing the menu, so I left it to the moms and sisters. The last time I saw, the order list was very long, I can't even remember what was in it. I do know, though, that we order eight Kambing Guling for 1,500-ish guests. Since I and Bangun are such huge fans of Kambing Guling and in most receptions it's pretty much gone in the first hour, we didn't want our wedding to run out of it. I think it kinda worked, because according to some of our friends and family, the lambs were still available until about 9-ish.

When you're standing there on the stage, it's very difficult to care or even notice anything going on with the caterers, so let's rely on testimonials from family and friends. Thankfully, none of them said anything bad about the foods. In fact, the biggest compliments we received were about the catering service.

You know how in receptions you see the waiters pushing around a lorry for the dirty dishes, put them in the pantry and then went back to serve the guests? Yeah, they don't do that in DTC. They have enough manpowers to serve the guests, take out the dirty dishes and prepare the foods in the pantry. Their head butler also walked up to the stage to give me, Bangun and our parents mineral water in the middle of the reception, during the Saman dance performance.

The decoration they gave, the flowers and centerpieces, were also exceptionally good. Very satisfying. Too bad I don't have any picture of it. But let me tell you this; I'm giving 7 out of 5 stars for DTC. Although the bill has single-handedly doubled the whole budget for this wedding, again, it was worth every single penny (and tear).

 

The person to contact is Retno at 021 7081 2532

Looking back: Ratu Wedding

Speaking of Cut Marlyn, my biggest concern was their bridal make-up. Therefore, I decided to use Ratu Wedding instead, with their main make-up artist, Mbak Tanti.

Mbak Tanti is this young-looking, very pretty, very soft-spoken lady who is nice to be around with. She arrived earlier than me in PTIK, so that's a good beginning. Exactly at 1 p.m. She started to do her thang, and about 90 minutes later we were done. I like what she did for my akad, with the headpiece and the soft-yet-very-Sumatranese-kinclong make-up.



Make-up and hairdo by Mbak Tanti and team

 In the afternoon, she and her two assistants retouched the make-up and made it more eye-catching for the reception. I like it too, but I think it was a bit too thick. But hey what do I know, heavy make-up for me is colored lip balm, one-layer mascara and thin eyelines. I absolutely love the bindi she put on my forehead, though. Pretty.

Waiting for our par-tay to begin

They also put a soft layer of foundation (or was it powder?) to Bangun, and I think it was of the right amount. I often see grooms are overly made-up in weddings, and thank God mine was not one of them.

All in all, with the low price and high-quality service she presented, I give 5 out of 5 stars for Mbak Tanti of Ratu Wedding, despite the over-layering for the reception. Tapi kan katanya kalo nggak menor bukan manten Sumatra...

The person to contact is Lili or Ami at 021 4788 1712

Looking back: Cut Marlyn Decoration

With the aftermath, the reviews shall come. Be aware though, that all the pictures uploaded are low-quality photos. Maybe later when Lightbrush is done with the JPEGs, I will put some of them up.

And so let's begin with the number one review: Cut Marlyn Decoration.

Let me repeat, there's not much Acehnese wedding vendors out there that focus on, well, Aceh. Cut Marlyn Decoration is one of the few, and from what I read, see, and hear, they're the best one out there.

Looking from the work they did with the stage, flowers and decoration, it could not have been more true. Quite a few people told us that the pelaminan was amazing, beautiful, and other synonyms you can ever think of. Alhamdulillah. Tante Marlyn and her daughter, Kak Dede, were top-notch professionals who knew what they were doing.




Photo courtesy of Kak Dede


The best thing was, in my opinion, when Tante Marlyn could tell that I was uncomfortable with the sunting after they put it on for the reception. It stabbed my scalp and hurt like hell, but since I'd never worn any sunting before, I thought that was how it's supposed to feel. Ten minutes before the reception began, I struggled to throw the pain away and took a Panadol (thanks, Runi the MaHo!) and my hands were sweating. I was pretty sure I was gonna pass out, imagining I had to stand up and smile for the next 2.5 hours.

The two families were all lined up, ready to enter the reception area when Tante Marlyn suddenly halted us and said “let the guests wait.” She then walked to me, rearrange the stacks of my headpiece right there and then on the VIP dining table. She said she could tell I was in pain, and after she did her magic, I swear the pain was completely gone and the world was a better place again.




Kak Dede, left, and Tante Marlyn, right, the deadly duo of the night


Cuman emang agak berat aje.

However, there's one minor glitch from them. Days before, I'd told Kak Dede the list of people who will get their make-up done by her team, and how many family members will borrow the beskap and songket. But on the day, she arrived a bit late to PTIK and only brought two assistants. This delayed the whole preparation process and sent my mom to her highest, most crucial panic mode.

Scary.

Anyway. In the end, when the reception began, I felt like the prettiest girl in the room. And that's what mattered. I took one look at the auditorium just a nanosecond before we walked in, and it took my breath away. Cut Marlyn Decoration is really the best one out there, and it is worth every single penny.




Looking deliriously happy? Cos we were.


I'd give 4.5 out of 5 stars to Cut Marlyn Decoration. The person to contact is Kak Dede at 0811173710.

Atmaraya: 1 of 5 stars

So here's why I don't recommend Atmaraya to you good people out there. Or is it Atma Raya?

Sometime in September, we finalized the deal to print 600 invitations with a bonus of 700 thank-you notes with Vian, one of their marketers, I suppose, since he's always at the front desk serving the customers. After negotiating, we settled a price and a deadline, all written in the bill.

Vian wrote that by Oct. 5, our invitations would be ready. Since it was a weekday, we agreed to pick up the invitations on Oct. 8, while the thank-you notes were scheduled to be taken later.

Fast forward to Oct. 3, when I called Vian to tell him I had just sent an email of the design for the thank-you notes. I asked him casually about the invitations since Oct. 5 was two days away. And he answered, even more casually, that they were yet to be printed, and that “hopefully” it would be done by Oct. 8.

I asked, “Lho kan nulisnya selesai tanggal 5, Mas?”

You know what he said?

“Ya kan itu nulis doang, Mbak.”

…

From there, everything was going downhill. A hundred phone calls later, I went to Pasar Tebet on Oct. 8 to get the invitations with Bangun's mom. They told us the cards would be ready at 3 p.m., but when we arrived, the shop looked like a mess and my invitations were far from ready.

In the end, the finished at 8.30 p.m. Eight fuckin thirty. Gak enak yaa sama camer yaa. Plus, I and (what we assume was) the manager yelled at each other because he wanted us to pay the full bill while the thank-you notes were still unclear. I mean, seeing how slow they work, how could I get a guarantee that they would work on the notes?

However, we are satisfied with the result. Their quality is not bad, although I think the envelopes could have been improved.

In short, Atmaraya is not recommended because the way they handle customers is beyond awful. Too bad because they do have the skill to produce high-quality cards, but it seems that they don't try to impress their customers at all. The way they talk with half-smiles, the way they answer questions half-heartedly, the way they seem to think that customers have to follow the way they work..it's not worth the price, nor your time.

Look around more. I believe most vendors in Pasar Tebet are better, although their prices might be higher. According to my survey though, do consider Batang Printing in the left side of the basement. They offered us a very nice price but we had to reject because they couldn't meet our deadline.

Well at least someone's being honest about it.